Thursday Visit with Oscar



We have the cutest message saved on our answering machine from Little Oscar (with a little prompting from his mommy). Every once in a while I play it back, just to hear his clear sweet little voice saying, "Hi Oma!  Call back! I wuv you!" This heartwarming message always brings a smile to my face and into my heart. I just love this little guy! 

our grandson, Oscar

 

Come rain or shine or snow, we always take him for a walk to the "puck" (park).  Today it was slippery in spots and he wiped out on a patch of ice.  After that he stood on a patch of icy snow for awhile, sliding one of his boots over the snow and ice testing the bumpy and smooth parts to see which was slippery.  And then he started walking again, mostly avoiding the slippery sections.  Fascinating to watch!

 

 

Come rain or shine, we take Oscar for a walk

 

On the way home from the playground he's usually tuckered out so we stick him in his stroller.  He's just recently started singing and counting while he's sitting there.  Today he was singing parts of Bah, Bah, Black Sheep and Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star, and A, B, C, D, E, F, G  all through each other. I suddenly realized that they all have the same tune, so maybe he thinks they're all part of the same song.  He's also learning to count: "One, two, three, five, six, seven, eight, TEN!"  (usually skips 4 and 9).  

 Oscar checking what's in Oma's activity bag today

 

A few weeks ago I started a new tradition.  I bring an easily recognizable bright green bag with things for Oscar to play with while we are there.  When we arrive at their house I just set the bag down in the front hall with anything else we're bringing in.  He stands there looking at it for a while until I say, "It's OK, you can look in it."  The first thing that always comes out is a stuffed cat.  He loves it!  Then "The Big Fire Truck" book and the "Old MacDonald had a Farm" book.  We sing through that whole book together.  Today I had monkeys in a barrel and some stickers and we all got a sticker stuck onto our sweaters, in fact I just noticed that my frog sticker is still on my hoody.  It's so much fun!  

 

He's such a caring, sensitive little guy.  We were reading a book that had a child with a happy face on one page and a sad face on the opposite page.  He said, "Baby sad! Hug, hug?" and then he kissed the baby's sad face and hugged the book!  He hugs and cuddles his baby brother, Charlie, too. So adorable!  I just want to hug him, but unless he's sick or very tired, he's not into cuddling so much.

 

He also notices details and is very meticulous.  As he was playing with a fire truck and two little people this morning, I noticed that when he picked up the people from the floor to put them on the fire truck, he turned them so that they'd be facing the front of the truck.  Then he turned them to face the back of the truck before he let them step down off the truck again.  I couldn't believe it!  I just love watching him process things like this.  It's absolutely fascinating! Even though I was never really into little kids very much, I'm just enjoying and treasuring these little grand children of ours so much!

Now What?

This morning we woke up to a winter wonderland so we went out for a walk in the snow and the sun to enjoy the first real snow fall of the season. 

 

I've been thinking that at about this time last year we found out that the cancer was active again, this time in my right eye.  I honestly couldn't have imagined then that I would be feeling as well as I do now, a whole year later.  And what an amazing year it has been!  One round of chemo and two rounds of radiation treatments ...  How did we get through all of that?  It all feels like a miracle and a huge gift from God. 

snowy "chef's hats" on black-eyed Susan's seed pods

 

We lived from one exciting goal to the next, always something to plan for, to occupy our minds and to look forward to.  It started last Christmas when Mark and Rosemary broke the big news that they were expecting their first baby in July.  Wow! Another new grandchild to look forward to at the end of the radiation treatments.  And then Henry and Melanie told us they were expecting in September and then Alida and Jeff announced their engagement!  We had showers and parties all summer long.  The most recent celebration was the wedding a few weeks ago.  

 

My big, long-term hope was that I would be alive and well enough to be at Jeff and Alida's wedding.  Well, over and above all expectations, that big hope became reality.  I was able to fully participate in and thoroughly enjoy two solid days of activities and celebrations without even a single nap! What an amazing gift!
 

And now as we switch gears everyone's question is... "How are you doing since the wedding?"  My answer is, "Fine!  Absolutely fine!"  We were not involved in the wedding planning so it's not as if we had been super busy leading up to the wedding day, but we had been living towards the goal of the big day.  When the wedding was over, we had some long afternoon naps for a few days.  And then the big question surfaced:  "Now what?"

All these special events came at the right time during my treatments and during the after affects, and helped us cope by living in the moment, one day at a time, towards the next event.

About four and a half  years ago when the word "lymphoma" first entered our lives I immediately had a wish list of four things:  to live long enough to see grandchildren, to help my parents in their old age, if Alida were to get married that I could be at her wedding, and to spend special retirement time with Gerard. 

Well, God has granted me all these wishes already!  So now that the wedding is over, and the last wish left on my list has been granted, I live with the constant thought of, "Will God decide to call me home now that all the wishes on my list have been met?  I just can't seem to get rid of that thought. I feel so healthy (relatively speaking) right now, I got all my wishes. the blessings keep coming, life keeps rolling along ... I feel so blessed and yet I'm wondering how to live meaningfully in response to all these blessings and at the same time within my limitations.  It's a daily challenge. 

Our Family's Infant and Child CPR Training

This morning our family suddenly grew - by one new toddler and seven new babies!

The room was filled with babies; one for each of us.

 

The girls encouraged all of us to get baby CPR* training.  Rosemary arranged for a trainer to come to their house and invited us all for the CPR course and for lunch.  Melanie and Alida have both done this through work already and Jeff - I'm not sure, but all of the rest of us spent the morning together learning what to do in the event of an emergency, and visiting over lunch afterwards. 

learning what to do if a baby is choking

Mark with his two little girls

Hannah was quietly watching all the goings-on around her.  Hopefully we'll never need to use CPR on her, but if we do, we should now be better prepared to do so.

 

On the way home I was reflecting on what we had learned.  Hopefully if there is ever an emergency requiring CPR I'll be better prepared to deal with the situation.  However, after this morning I'm also more aware of all the potential risks of chocking and smothering and am wondering whether sometimes ignorance is bliss.

 

* CPR = Cardiopulmonary Resuscitation 

Where Were You When...

Isn't it amazing how some events can be etched into your memory as if they just happened yesterday? Today the news is filled with talk about the assassination of John F. Kennedy 50 years ago, which prompts the question, "Where were you when...?" and triggered memories of where I was for some other major events. 

The Assassination of President Kennedy - Nov. 22, 1963 - I was in Medicine Hat, Alberta, walking home from school for lunch.  Just as we were by the boards around the outdoor skating rink, someone told us that President Kennedy was shot.  As soon as we got home I told my dad the news.  He couldn't believe it, and immediately turned on the radio and sure enough, the airwaves were full of the shocking and unbelievable news!  The radio stayed on during our whole lunch time, which had never, ever happened in our family before. 

First Moon Landing - July 20, 1969  - My mom, my brothers Bart and Carel, and I were camping in the Finger Lakes area of New York on our way to Washington, DC (for some reason my dad stayed home with the younger kids).  It was a rainy day, so the neighbours camping across the road from us invited us to come with them to watch the landing on the moon.  We followed them to their home, which was about an hour away.  I remember that they were Tupperware dealers who had stacks of orders all over their house as reminders that they needed to be delivered. We enjoyed their warm hospitality, in a dry house, and we got to see the first landing on the moon!

Collapse of the World Trade Centre - Sept. 11, 2001 - I was at the Toronto City Mission office.  It was Tuesday, the day of our staff meeting.  Staff members were coming in from all over the city and with each arrival the story got worse.  Our book keeper usually attended the opening devotions and then went back to his computer.  He kept us posted on the latest developments.  What a day!

Toronto Black-out - August 14, 2003 - The power went out as I was getting an allergy shot.  As I left the office, the elevator wasn't working so I took the stairs.  On my way home the traffic lights weren't working either. I turned on the car radio and heard that there was a massive black-out all over north eastern North America!

Sunrise Propane Explosion in Toronto - Aug. 10, 2008 - We were awakened at 3:50 in the morning by some booming sounds.  At first we thought it was the Toronto Star truck dumping off bundles of papers for our neighbour kids to deliver.  It actually sounded like things being thrown into the back of a truck.  But the sounds just kept on going.  We opened the window and looked outside.  To the southwest of our house we saw the sky lighting up with each boom.  We rushed to the radio and TV and within half an hour heard that there had been a fire resulting in a big explosion at the propane storage tanks in Downsview.  Scary!

My Second Birth - March 23, 2011 at 2:30 am - I was in my bed at Sunnybrook Hospital for chemo treatments. Suddenly I was wide awake!  The only thing I could think of doing was to read the notes and Scripture passages from the sermon one of our visiting missionaries had preached a few weeks before.  I was sitting on my bed in my dark cubicle, trying to make out the print by the light coming in from the hallway.  And then I had an amazing "being born again" experience.  I read the familiar passages over and over again and they spoke to me so convictingly and in such a new way - as if I'd never heard them before.  All I could say over and over again was, "Thank you, Lord! Thank you, Lord!" (see July 01, 2001 blog post).  I wanted to tell everyone that it was my second birthday, but it was the middle of the night and no one was around. Interestingly, it happened on March 23rd at 2:30 am (all 2's and 3's just like my first birthday - July 23rd!).

Do you have events that are etched into your memory like this? I wonder why certain events, even when they are not part of your personal experience, can make such a detailed and lasting impression on our minds?

In the Grocery Store

Here are a few interesting things I saw in our grocery store yesterday.   

bright yellow and blue poinsettias!

 



"free bandaid and cotton ball with every flu shot"

kosher food labelling

 

grocery stores cater to high Jewish population in our area

Flashbacks to Halloween

Couldn't resist posting these pictures:)

 Oscar 2011

 

Oscar 2013 

 Oscar and Charlie 2013

 

Oscar and Charlie 2013

 

* Haven't been able to track down Halloween pictures of Hannah yet.

Some More Wedding Pictures

Here are a few more wedding pictures... (Double click on pictures to enlarge)

 Father and the Bride 

The Bridal Party

Bride & Groom with Parents

Gerard, Ellie, Cheryl, Steve 

The Sibblings

Mark, Rosemary, Jeff, Alida, Henry, Melanie



Lest We Forget

This morning I went downtown to observe Remembrance Day at the Old City Hall Cenotaph. We usually go to the North York ceremony near our house, but since Gerard was off volunteering at The Lighthouse food bank, I decided to go and check out two things I've heard about on the radio over the years. As I boarded the subway I still wasn't sure where I'd go first.  Quick decision:  downtown first.  Got there early enough to find a relatively good spot right next to two teachers with their ESL classes.  So I overheard them explaining everything to their students - which was interesting! 

 

The ceremony drew a huge crowd. A few hecklers were quickly taken care of by security and police on horseback.  What struck me was the very strong Christian tones of the prayer and definitely the traditional hymns.  We also sang "O Canada" and "God Save the Queen" which we hardly ever sing anywhere anymore.  I love the pomp and circumstance of the parade, the colours, the flyover, the uniforms, the tolling bell, and all the tradition.  It makes me feel connected to people of the past. 

 

  fascinating hat that stood out in the crowd

 

I only saw a handful of veterans and, probably because there are so few left, they were surrounded by the press. These were innocent young men and women setting out on their "adventure", probably having no idea what they were getting into. To be interviewed by the press as heroes probably boggles their minds.

 

 

Something I saw for the very first time is that after the ceremony, people removed the poppies from their coats and pinned them onto the wreaths at the cenotaph.

 

After the downtown ceremony I hopped back onto the subway and headed for Sunnybrook Hospital - home of Canada's largest veterans residence.  I knew that their ceremony would be long over, but wanted to see for myself the flags that I had heard and read about. 

 

 

I was not disappointed. The place was covered with flags! each representing a donation made to the "Raise a Flag" campaign in support of programs providing services for our veterans.  On Bayview Avenue, the entire length of the Sunnybrook property was lined with little Canadian flags. Inside the campus the roads, sidewalks and flowerbeds were lined and in front of the George Hees Residence the lawn was completely filled with flags.  They reminded me of the "crosses row on row".

 

In contrast to the noise and the crowds and hoopla downtown, here it was very quiet and peaceful.  The ceremony was over, the crowds had dissipated, the cenotaph with its wreaths stood abandoned.  All I could see was hundreds, probably thousands, of flags. 

 

 

This peaceful viewing of the flags actually was much more touching and meaningful for me than all the busyness downtown.  It helped me focus and reflect on what this day is really all about. It helped me take a few moments to think about the heroic acts carried out and also the lives sacrificed for the cause of freedom and peace.  It helped to refresh my thanksgiving for this beautiful, free and peaceful country in which we are privileged to live.   



Jeff and Alida's Wedding

We are still living in the afterglow of yesterday's wonderful wedding celebration. At church today people were asking us, "How was the wedding?" I've been trying to come up with fitting words to adequately capture my experience of the day. The whole day was wonderful! It was God honouring and joyful; their strong faith commitment shone through in everything - the ceremony, the speeches, the whole reception; the food was delicious; Alida looked stunning; the babies looked so-o-o cute in their wedding outfits; the streetcar and the dance were lots of fun; it was great to celebrate with so many friends and family members... Just an all-round wholesome, happy, heartwarming, wonderful celebration!

Being fully involved in everything, I didn't take many pictures and the ones I have were taken on the run, so didn't turn out the greatest, but here are a few for now.  I hope I'll be getting more from people in the next few days. Otherwise I'll have to wait until the official photographer's pictures are ready. 

the rehearsal on Friday

the beautiful bride

with her attendants: Rosemary, Heather, and Melanie.

 

Introducing Mr. and Mrs. Jeff and Alida Butler!

Congratulations, Jeff and Alida!

One of the fun things they did was charter a street car to shuttle guests from the parking under Nathan Phillips Square to the church, and later back to the parking and reception hall which were right across the street from each other.  It took a few runs to transport all the guests and then only the bridal party went around the loop one extra time to take pictures inside the street car.  Really fun! 

Some of the Duiker guests enjoying the streetcar ride

 

and Alida and Jeff enjoying the ride in the back seat.

 

All in all a wonderful celebration!  Thank you, Lord, for yesterday! What a huge gift!

Let the Celebrations Begin!

card matching the wedding colours

There! Just finalized our speech for tomorrow's wedding, wrote some cards, decided on what to wear for the rehearsal dinner and now I need to have a little nap before we head downtown for the rehearsal and the rehearsal dinner. Oh, and yesterday Alida and I went to get a manicure and pedicure. That was a first for me. All the other ladies (bride, bridesmaids, mother-in-law) are getting their hair done tomorrow, but mine is so very short that Alida and I decided to do the manicure/pedicure together instead. So now everything's ready.

 

   Let the celebrations begin!



Random Updates

Lots of news, but hardly any pictures.  I've been too busy living life to take pictures or to spend a lot of time reflecting on it.  And that feels great!  Gerard has also completely recovered from his bladder infection and is back to normal again.  We are so very thankful for our health. 

 

The final countdown is on for Alida and Jeff's wedding - "only four more sleeps" as Jeff's mom says.  We phoned each other on Sunday just to share our motherly excitement around the wedding of our children.  Jeff and Alida have done all the planning together.  All Gerard and I have to do is finalize our speech,  get dressed up and show up.  On Friday evening we'll participate in the rehearsal and be treated by Jeff's parents to rehearsal dinner at a restaurant, and then it will be Saturday - the big day! I am so thrilled and thankful that I am given these very healthy days to be part of Alida's wedding and celebrations!

 

 

colour from the kindergarten classroom where I've been volunteering

 

And my hair has grown in enough that by popular vote I have been encouraged to go natural with my own very short hair for the wedding, rather than wearing my wig.  This was my goal, but there's nothing I can do about how fast my hair grows back in.  I do rub my scalp, just in case that will increase blood circulation and hoping that will help my hair to grow in faster. I usually don't cover it with anything, hoping that the air will also help. We eat healthy and get a fair bit of exercise.  I have no idea whether any of these things helped, but at least I can say I did my best.  And Alida got the final vote - she likes my short hair better than my wig and it's her wedding, so that's the final decision.

 

 



more colour from the kindergarten classroom

 

So my days have been filled with sorting and cleaning one closet shelf per day; attending Pilates class, Bible reading group, and helping with English conversation group; visiting with the grandchildren; visiting with my sister for two days; lane swimming twice a week; walking; reading... life is good!

 

And we have no medical appointments this week.  Our doctors have all marked their files with November 9 as our daughter's wedding date and so have scheduled follow-up appointments for after the wedding.  "Go and celebrate and enjoy and we'll see you later in November (or December)". So that's great!  We can focus totally on the wedding celebrations. 

 

As you may have noticed, a few days ago I tried to change the picture at the top of my blog but it was way too wide. Today I tried again.  Same problem. I wanted to insert my fall picture because the tulips-and-robin-eggs time of the year has gone by a long time ago.  However, for now this spring picture will have to do.  Since it's so very different from what we're seeing outside right now, maybe it can help us appreciate the uniqueness and distinct beauty of the changing seasons.