Fall Colours in the Garden

I love the smell and feel of fall and have been starting to get outside a bit every day to be energized by the garden again.  I start out by dragging myself out there, telling myself that I'm sure it will give me energy, and sure enough, it never fails!  I come in more motivated and energized 20 or 30 minutes later. 

Love the combination of these vibrant colours

of the yellow blanket flowers and deep red garden mums!

snapdragons in the vegetable garden

sedum and black-eyed susan

As predicted, I'm starting to reach the time, one to two weeks after the last radiation treatment, when the side effects of the radiation are expected to peak.  So far I've just been more tired than before and mildly nauseous, but both come and go throughout the day and so far have been very manageable.  Still taking naps and sleeping-in most mornings.  When I have bursts of energy I do little things around the house or we go out. 

Yesterday morning we went to run some errands, including looking for a suitable hat with a wide brim to shade my face. My skin is very sensitive to the sun because of the radiation (very normal) and so I've been told to stay out of the sun.  I don't like wearing things on my head so I'm very particular about what I feel comfortable wearing. The hat we bought for gardening earlier is too summery now,  and most stores don't carry many other kinds of wide-brimmed hats for this season.  

and a cosmos flower in the vegetable garden

Then we decided to  check out Tent City (a camping supply store), and there found a "safari hat" that I feel quite comfortable with. Since the radiation, exercise generally helps me feel better.  In the morning I usually do yoga with DVD's from the library, and in the evening we walk. So with my new hat I'm looking forward to getting out more during the day.

A Closer Look at Our Little Grandson

Yesterday Antie Alida went to meet her little nephew for the first time and took some close-up shots.

They're looking very comfortable together already!

And here is little Oscar on Day 2.

Mommy has chosen a monkey theme for Oscar's bedroom.  He is surrounded by monkeys - monkey decals on the wall, stuffed monkeys, monkey books, crib sheets, clothes, and anything else that comes in a monkey theme. Very cute!  Hope he likes monkeys!

For now we're giving mommy and daddy a rest.  I just keep looking at the pictures and feeling so blessed and amazed and awed by it all, but we'll have to go down to give him a little snuggle and hug again sometime real soon!

A Tiny Precious Huge Blessing!

This afternoon we became grandparents! Little Oscar James was born at around 3 o'clock at the hospital and they were all home together again only about three hours later! We were invited to come and see him right away, so we got the privilege of seeing and holding this precious little bundle already. The Oscar part of his name comes from Henry's middle name, and Henry is named after his grandfather - Oscar Duiker- an honorable family name!

Opa and Oma - that's us!

What a little miracle!  He's so tiny and soft and adorable!  Long thin fingers, tiny ears, tiny toes, peach fuzzy blond hair, sweet little face!  Amazing!

thouroughly exhausted Daddy and Mommy

Poppa and Opa - the two proud grandfathers

time with Daddy

the first diaper change - a family effort

This is so exciting!  Thank you, Lord!  What a blessing!  In the spring Alida figured out that my treatments would probably be over just in time for the birth of the baby, and here he is, - five days after my last treatment!  In case you're wondering, yes, I did get permission to broadcast this good news and to post these pictures.  Henry and Melanie are both so tired now that they'll get around to pictures and facebook announcements, or whatever, sometime after they get some rest. 

Ready to Celebrate!

Today life is looking much brighter! We started off the day by shaving off all my hair. What a relief and how liberating! Now I don't have to think about losing it anymore. It's gone and that's over with. Time to get on with living. It can only get better from here on in. No more poison chemo or harmful radiation. My hair is expected to start growing back eventually. I'm ready to celebrate! We are going out for dinner with the whole family tonight!

Thank you, Lord, for healing! Thank you, Lord, for chemo and radiation and medical staff! Thank you for Gerard, Henry, Melanie, Mark, Rosemary, Alida, and our soon-to-be-born little grandson! Thank you for our extended family, our church community and friends and neighbours!

Thank you, Lord, for answered prayers!

Thank you, Lord, for life!

celebration dinner with the family

All Done with Cancer Treatments!

This morning I had my last radiation treatment. It's hard to believe that it's all over. And it felt very weird walking away from the clinic. My emotions were all over the place (what else is new?). I was trying to tell myself that this should be exciting, but it didn't feel that way.

Sooner or later it will probably start to register, but now it all feels surreal; the fact that I actually had cancer and the new fact that now it's all gone and the treatments are all done. Actually when they took the radiation mask off after the treatment, I started crying. "Tears of joy?" the radiologist asked. My response - "I don't know!"

my radiation trophy - the mask

This mask was molded to my face.  For each treatment I would lie on my back on the radiation table.  Then they put this mask over my face and clamped it to the table so that I would not move my head at all.  They had masking tape on it, marking the targets for radiation, but had to take them off before giving me the mask - hospital policy.  I had hoped to keep them on so I could know exactly where the radiation went.  Actually they radiated my whole head (except my neck) behind my eyes, teeth and ears.

After today's treatment I was given a little card that says, "Your Radiation Treatment is Finished" with information on what to expect, side effects, etc. One of the points under "What will happen after my radiation treatments are finished?" says, "Some people are very excited to be finished their radiation treatments. Other people find this time very difficult." so maybe I'm one of "the other people". Being done with chemo was very exciting! But today after the radiation I don't know how I feel.

Today my hair is still falling out, which is also putting a bit of a damper on my enthusiasm about the end of treatments. This morning I woke up with a bit of a new perspective though. I was thinking that now I have a new lease on life and I will get to start this new part of my life with brand new hair! (the doctor did say that this would only be temporary hair loss, whereas for some people radiation results in permanent hair loss).

I think that from now on we'll probably always be referring to events as happening "before cancer" and "after cancer". Today we just realized that it is exactly a year ago since I left on a trip to visit Alida in Australia. Wow! Does that ever feel like a long time ago! It almost feels like that happened in another life time.

We saw this "building" every time we went to the hospital and the cancer clinic.  What is so amazing is that this is actually a big sheet hanging from a building, showing what the future new building is going to look like, but it looks so real!  At the very far right end you can see some bulges in the fabric, so you know it's just a picture. Every time we drive by it I'm fascinated by it so we finally stopped to take a picture a few days ago.

Losing My Hair

Well, it's finally happening, again, but a lot faster this time. As of this afternoon I'm losing my hair and I'm finding it very upsetting. I knew it was coming soon, but was still secretly hoping that it wouldn't actually happen.

Yesterday my scalp was very itchy, this morning very sensitive, and then after my treatment today my scalp felt like it was itchy and burning. The right side of my head was so sensitive that I couldn't lie on that side during nap time.

I kept pulling my hair yesterday and only got a loose hair here or there. This morning I asked Gerard to take a picture of me with my white wavy hair just in case I would start losing it today. Then this afternoon I suddenly started to get 10 or 15 hairs coming out at a time, but only from certain spots. It was very upsetting! I just kept pulling out hairs, throwing them in the toilet, and crying.

While we went for a walk this evening I kept pulling and more and more hair came out, just like a cat or dog shedding its fur. There's a trail of my hair all the way from our house to Yonge Street and back. By now I'd guess I've lost about half of my hair in just the last seven hours.

I'm feeling angry and upset and frustrated and guilty all at the same time. Angry because I had been looking forward to feeling all happy and excited and relieved tomorrow after my very last treatment and now I'm going to be dealing with loosing or having no hair tomorrow. Upset and crying because I don't want to lose my hair. Guilty because I know I have so many things to be thankful for - the tumors are gone and I'm still alive to experience losing my hair - that being upset about losing it seems kind of trivial in the grand scheme of things. Frustrated because my brain is saying one thing and my emotions are feeling something else.

There, getting that all out makes me feel much better! Thanks for listening.
Last radiation treatment tomorrow at 10:50 am! I'm sure I'll manage with the hair loss once I make the transition and get used to the idea. It's just upsetting as it's happening.

Yesterday and today's inspirational thoughts on my little flip calendar seemed to be written just for me:

It's said that you can only take someone as far as you have gone yourself. Over the last few months, you have travelled a great distance, perhaps even farther than you thought you could go.


Now it may be time for you to take the hand of someone who is just starting their journey and say, "Come with me. I've been this way before, and I know God will be with us every step of the way."

Quick Garden Update

O, Happy Day!!!!  ... therapeutic touch session, gentle yoga class, radiation treatment (10 down, 2 to go), still have all my hair, people are starting to refer to me as a cancer survivor, and it's finally raining - 8 hours of steady drizzle so far. So good for the garden!

cosmos



Some things that I grew from seed myself are a bit behind schedule this year.  Oh well, next spring I'll hopefully get back at gardening with renewed energy. The first two cosmos flowers opened up a few days ago.  I'm still hoping for some special double ones.  The one in the background is kind of double, but not as dramatic as I had hoped.  There are still more buds, so you never know - we'll see.

first green peppers of the summer

we've had loads of cherry tomatoes already

first big tomato of the season

milk weed seed pods (upright pointy things)

I'm so excited about the seed pods on this beautiful orange kind of milkweed (no flowers right now - they turned to seed pods)!  We've had this plant for years and it just sits there, not getting any bigger.  This is the first time it has grown these seed pods so I'm hoping for lots of seeds resulting in lots of extra plants!

And I'm babysitting these little boots for Alida.  They're so cute! but not very practical for growing plants because they have no drainage holes.  The original mint plant died, so that's why it landed here for a while.  I've been asked to try to start basil in it, but I think some kind of succulent plant will work better. That's our next option if this basil doesn't work.  Doesn't hurt to do some experimenting.

Only two more radiation treatments and then???

Thankful for a Good Week!

This has been a great week. Despite the fact that I expected to be feeling worse and worse or weaker and weaker going through chemo and now radiation (9 treatments down, three to go), I'm actually feeling better with each treatment so far. I feel like I'm gradually emerging from under a huge weight that has been hanging around for about eight months now.

We are so thankful and relieved that everything has gone so well - way beyond our wildest expectations! Our radiologist told us on Wednesday that we could expect the side effects of the radiation to peak out about a week or two after the last treatment. That was a bit of a surprise to me. I thought once I made it through the treatments, which are going without any major side effects so far, then I'd be done, but I guess not. The thing I'm still dreading is losing all my hair. I keep pulling at bunches of hair, but nothing is coming out yet. We'll see what happens and when. O, and the radiologist had planned to put me on steroids during the radiation, but decided to hold off with them until I actually need them (for headaches or swelling).  And I haven't needed them yet!

This week has been amazing! Like I said, I feel like I'm finally emerging from hanging in there for eight months. On Tuesday I attended the first staff meeting of the new season at the mission. Last night we got together with our small group for dinner and catching up and praying together after the whole summer. I've baked apple crumble and muffins and vacuumed the whole house this week and today prepared shepherd's pie using the little harvest of potatoes from our garden and did a wee bit of gardening.

This morning I tagged along with Gerard on his Saturday morning rounds: milk and newpaper from the corner store, cash from the banking machine, bagels, groceries and then some potting soil from Canadian Tire.

love this "bagel tree" at the bagel shop!

Look what I found at the grocery store!  A cooking pumpkin (with a stem! - pumpkins look better with a stem in my opinion!) and some decorative gourds.  Having these on display in our house at this time of year is kind of an annual tradition.  I love the colours and the intriguing shapes!

And this afternoon I potted some plants from the garden, that I want to keep over the winter.  I never thought I would ever regard working in the garden as a chore!  Usually it relaxes and energizes me, but for the last month or so I haven't done anything out there at all.  I just couldn't find the energy or motivation for it.  That shows that I'm not back to my normal self yet, but I'm getting there!  Today I finally got out and watered some plants.  It's been soooo dry here the last few weeks.  Can't wait for some rain!  It keeps blowing over our place.  And then I potted a few plants.  Can't say I was super excited about doing it, but it did feel good to be doing something in the garden again.  It'll come back!

Psalm 27 - Seeking God

For some reason Psalm 27 keeps coming my way lately. It happened again yesterday when it was read as part of the opening devotional at our staff meeting. Why am I encountering this piece of Scripture over and over again these days? Is God trying to tell me something?

Lately I have been reading a translation/paraphrase of the Bible called, "Life Application Bible for Students - The Living Bible". I have no idea where I got it from. Maybe from our daughter's "to give away" pile, or from Value Village. Anyway, I'm enjoying it.

What I really like about it is all the extra notes it has in the side bars and the introductions to each book of the Bible. There are also questions at the end of each book to help you think about what you've read and to apply it to your daily life.

Beside Psalm 27 there is a note referring to verse 5:
RELIANCE: We often run to God when we are experiencing difficulties. But David sought God's guiding presence every day. When troubles came his way, he was already in God's presence and prepared to handle any test. Believers can call to God for help at any time. How shortsighted it is to call on God only after trouble has come! Many of our problems could be avoided or handled far more easily by constantly relying on God's help and direction.

(To save you the trouble of looking it up - In verses 4 to 6 of Psalm 27 the writer David says: "The one thing I want from God, the thing I seek most of all, is the privilege of meditating in his Temple, living in his presence every day of my life, delighting in his incomparable perfections and glory. There I'll be when troubles come. He will hide me. He will set me on a high rock out of reach of all my enemies. Then I will bring him sacrifices and sing his praises with much joy.")

Halfway through Radiation Already!

Six treatments down, six to go.  We're halfway throught the radiation treatments already!

Yesterday was the quickest appointment we ever had!  In and out just like that and today was almost as fast.  Gerard usually drops me off at the front door of the cancer centre.  I check in at registration while he parks the car.  All I do is swipe my health card through a little gadget, my upcoming appointments pop up on the computer screen, and they know I'm there.  Very efficient system! 

just swipe my health card and they know I'm there



Before I could even sit down I was called in and before Gerard could drink his coffee, that he picks up from the volunteer cart on his way in, I was ready to go home! 

Tomorrow, in connection with our appointment, we meet with the radiologist for a "review" - just to discuss how I'm doing in the way of side effects and for an opportunity to ask any questions we may have.  The first day I had a headache, the second day I was very tired, and the third day I experienced some light nausea.  And now I'm usually a little off (tired, mild yucky feeling) for about four or five hours after the treatment and then fine for the rest of the day - without any medication at all!  It seems my body is getting used to the radiation and not reacting as much/little as at first.

shamrock in the garden is in full bloom

This morning I attended the first staff meeting of the new season at the mission where I normally work (I'm on long-term disability leave right now).  It felt so-o-o-o-o good to be there!  Just seeing everyone and hearing updates about the summer day camps was wonderful!  And being "out there" instead of just hanging around the couch and the house also felt great!

I'm looking forward to spending more time there once my teatments are over.  Actually, I might not be able to do all that much there until my cataracts are removed because working at the computer for more than a short while puts too much strain on my eyes right now. We'll have to see how things go in the next few weeks or months.

O well, all in all I feel so blessed!  The chemo went well (meaning no major side effects), the radiation is going well - way better than either of us had dared to hope!  And on top of all of that, the tumors are already gone, and there is a little grandchild on the way in a few weeks, and all of our children are close by and of great support to us.

Just so many blessings!  Thank you, Lord!

Apple Crumble Craving Satisfied

For the last four or five days I've been thinking alot about apple crumble.  I don't usually crave baked or sweet things, but this idea of apple crisp or apple crumble just wouldn't go away.  So this afternoon I baked some!  I didn't really have all that much energy so it went in stages:  peel and cut up a few apples, lie on the couch, cut up a few more apples, lie on the couch, mix up the sugar and cinnamon, back on the couch, measure out the rolled oats, the flour, you get the picture... 

So it was getting close to dinner time and we're looking at this tempting looking apple crumble and... guess what we had for dinner?  

And so we wouldn't feel too guilty, Gerard made us a big salad too.

A few days ago someone welcomed me to the ranks of cancer survivors!  Wow!  I hadn't been thinking in those terms quite yet.  After eight months of having this cancer diagnosis and still being busy with radiation treatments, it's hard to switch our thinking to it being all over already.  But it won't be long! 

Today our hibiscus plant was in full bloom!  I counted 21 of these huge  8-inches-across flowers!  Some of the construction guys (working a few houses over) even came to check them out.

My sore mouth cleared up overnight and I'm feeling fine today, except for not having much energy.  And as soon as I press "publish post" we're heading out for a walk. 

Sunday Evening

Here we are at Sunday evening again already! It's been good to have two days "off" from radiation. I don't have a lot of energy these days, but got cheered up and energized by a visit from our daughter yesterday and managed to attend church and stay for the potluck lunch afterwards today, so that was good.

My mouth is starting to hurt in a few places - kind of blistery. Hope this doesn't get too serious. I've heard of people getting that really bad, but I thought that was from chemo. I still have a special mouthwash that they prescribed for me a few months ago, but didn't end up using it then, so I think I'll pull that out and use it now.

Tomorrow it's back to radiation treatments five days in a row. Now that my mouth is starting to hurt I'm getting worried about other possible side effects starting up soon. Hoping and praying that it will stay manageable.

And now there are a few things that have been bothering me the last few days, that I need to clear up. First of all -I should know better than to start telling you all the things I do to "manage" from day to day and giving advice about things.

Whenever I make some kind of resolution to do anything on a regular basis, it goes fine until I tell anyone else about it. So last week, right after I shared this lovely long list of things I do to help myself cope, everything fell apart (no more green smoothies, no house cleaning, only half the amount of exercise, daily devotions all over the place, not much appetite for healthy eating, or any kind of eating). That was also when the radiation started and sapped my energy, and these were ways of managing when I had more energy than last week, I guess.

Another confession I need to make: when I was talking about, "What's the Use of Worrying?" and some of you tell me that I'm such an inspiration, well, I'm really not all that brave. I was basically "preaching" to myself because I'm such a worry wart and was trying to allow Scripture to change my perspective. I really don't have it all figured out, but with God's help and all the other support I have around me I'll manage somehow, some days better than others.

Here's a comment my sister wrote in response to one of my blog entries last week. Thought You might like it. I did.

Every hike that I've ever been on has it's difficult parts, its more boring parts, and its exciting and gorgeous parts - but it's all part of the journey. Hang in there, sis!

One Third Way Through Radiation!

Four radiation treatments down, eight to go.  One third done already!  Ginger Gravol is helping with mild nausea and the couch helps when I'm tired.  So far so good!  So far it's been way easier than I expected!  We'll see how it goes next week.  Now we have two days off over the weekend. 

The fall planting of lettuce is coming along.  Spinach all disappeared.  I think the slugs got the seedlings as fast as they came up.

Our sedum flowers are just opening and the bees, wasps, butterflies and moths are loving them!

Here's my entire potato harvest for this year!  Average of one little potato per plant.  O well, I tried.

All the elevator doors at the cancer centre look nice and flowery like this right now.  Part of a campaign to raise funds for a new breast cancer clinic, I think. 

What's the Use of Worrying?

Good thing Gerard took a picture of my new white wavy hair yesterday. I will enjoy it while it lasts because today I was told that I'm going to lose my hair, temporarily, that is.

Our radiation oncologist decided to change my radiation treatment plan after consulting with the opthamologist who told me last week that I have cataracts. They will now radiate everything related to my eyes except the lenses. This method will result in losing my hair after all.

My initial reaction was disappointment and tears, but I quickly realized that getting my eyes thoroughly treated, keeping them well, and getting rid of all of the cancer is more important than keeping my hair. I'm still disappointed, but am trying to convince myself that it's not the worst thing that could happen.

Actually, I was expecting to lose my hair from the chemo already and was pleasantly surprised when it only thinned out. I was all prepared with a wig and a drawer full of hats and kerchiefs that I've hardly used yet. It will be more comfortable to wear all these things in the cooler fall weather than in the hot summer. So the timing is not so bad. And with this mild dose of radiation my hair is expected to grow back.

I haven't completely convinced myself that I'm OK with losing my hair, but I guess I'll learn to deal with it when it happens, just like everything else that has come our way since January.

As far as dealing with the radiation so far... Yesterday, about an hour before leaving for our first appointment, I was really nervous - lots of tears. I guess I was still looking at a whole lot of unknowns all together - radiation, possible side effects, and the final result - will all the cancer be gone?

Now that we're actually into the radiation, that is one less unknown, and now we're into a daily routine of dealing with what's happening one day at a time again - that's a lot easier than trying to deal with my whole entire future all at once.

Scripture tells us that worrying doesn't help and that it doesn't add a single day to our life. In fact, worrying robs us of fully living the present day that we do have. So we trust that God holds us in His care and that we can rest in Him.

Yesterday I felt great and was very active after the first treatment, and then got a headache, which faded away late in the evening. Today, after the second treatment, I slept all afternoon and have taken it very easy and have no headache so far. Just not much of an appetite. We have steroid pills that I can take if I get really nauseous or have bad headaches, but I'm trying to stay away from them as long as possible.

Thank God with us for the miraculous healing we have experienced so far and please pray that my eyes will be fully treated and will come through this radiation without any long-term damage. Thanks so much for your support!

Look what we were given a few days ago - getting ready for our first grand child!

Don't worry about anything; instead pray about everything; tell God your needs, and don't forget to thank Him for His answers.  If you do this you will experience God's peace, which is far more wonderful than the human mind can understand.  His peace will keep your thoughts and your hearts quiet and at rest as you trust in Christ Jesus.   Philippians 4: 6-7 TLB

And besides, what's the use of worrying?  What good does it do?  Will it add a single day to your life?  Of course not!  And if worry can't even  do such little thiings as that, what's the use of worrying over bigger things?  Luke 12: 25-26 TLB

Let Him have all your worries and cares, for He is always thinking about you and watching everything that concerns you. I Peter 5:7  TLB

Started Radiation Today

Today I had my first of 12 radiation treatments.  We'll be going to Sunnybrook every business day so we've pretty well put these three weeks aside for radiation. Today they gave us an orientation, took x-rays and put marks on my mask in preparation for the radiation.  So this appointment was longer than the rest will be.  The actual radiation went really fast - a matter of minutes.  She told me the treatment would be starting and then it was over.  I saw some lights flashing and heard fans in the machine.  Didn't feel anything and now three hours later still feel just as I did before.  They told us that side effects probably won't show up until next week sometime.  So we'll see.  Hard to believe that just a little zap for twelve days in a row can kill cancer cells.  Please keep on praying!

This sign shows when your appointment will be.  The letters and numbers on the left indicate the machine.  Mine is PRI2 at the top.  They have 13 treatment centres and see about 400 people a day for radiation alone!  Then there is also the chemo clinic upstairs.

Just thought I'd show you my new wavy hair, just in case I lose it during radiation.  My hair thinned out a lot from the chemo so I had it cut very short at that time - nice and comfortable and easy for the summer.  Now it's starting to grow back and it's coming in very white! and wavy.  I like the wavy part and am starting to get used to the white part. 

My mom and my brother Jeff

I've been seeing sunflowers everywhere lately.  So yesterday we stopped to take this picture in a field along our way back from visiting my parents.

Working on Getting Better

front yard flowers



As mentioned in my last post, I've been told that I don't need to be concerned about being productive every day because now is the time to take care of myself and my job now is to get better.

Somehow that made me feel a bit uncomfortable. For one thing, I'm not used to spending all my time focussed on myself. And for another, how do you go about "getting better"? Do I have any control over getting better? I mean, some people don't survive cancer, regardless of all the treatments. care and prayer they receive. At the same time I have heard that a positive attitude has a lot to do with your well-being and that some people are real "fighters". So there must be some things you can try to at least help the healing along.

I once was a member of a girls club called Ora et Labora (pray and work). I can't believe that was the name for a girls club! but I do believe in the idea, so that's been my approach to "getting better" - praying for healing and working on creating an environment conducive for healing.

Actually, at first I wasn't even thinking about getting better. I was just trying to absorb the diagnosis and to deal with whatever came our way. After getting past the initial hype around the whole situation, the excess energy from steroids, and then making it through the first few rounds of chemo and hospital stays without major side effects, I finally started wondering whether there was anything I could do to help my body fight this cancer.

The very first thing we did after the diagnosis was pray - pray for physical and spiritual healing. Sometimes I couldn't even pray, but many, many people prayed on our behalf and are still praying for us! And we have been experiencing answers to prayer ever since.

At the same time I was getting chemo treatments, with radiation to follow. It seemed ironic, and scary sometimes, that pouring poisons into my body could provide healing, but we had to trust that this is one of the most effective ways to deal with cancer available right now.

Many of my hospital room mates told me of herbal and other alternative treatments. I started exploring those a bit and asked people for recommendations for naturopaths or herbalists, etc. I was thinking that maybe I could follow a special diet or take herbs, or whatever, to strengthen my immune system during the chemo.

In the end we decided, "One thing at a time". Chemo and monthly hospital stays were enough to deal with. We did not have the emotional energy to figure out new foods or to attend more appointments or to even investigate options.

morning glories wandering around the vegetable garden

Once we kind of got used to a new "normal" and I began feeling somewhat better, I started getting interested in improving my situation. I had to at least try to do something about it! Here are the things I found to be helpful (in random order):

1. Rest: Without a nap I'm usually an emotional "basket case" in the evening, so I force myself to have at least one hour of sleep, or quiet time if I can't sleep, every afternoon and make myself get at least seven hours of sleep per night. With steroids it was hard to relax, but now I have no trouble sleeping past 6 am!

2. Healthy Food: We eat lots of fruits and vegetables, prepare all our food from scratch, have a green smoothie every day, try to avoid processed foods and sugar, and are slowly switching to organic produce.

3. Exercise: Right from the diagnosis, if I felt up to it, we walked every day, rain or shine or snow. Sometimes it was only a few houses up the street and other times for over an hour. Even in the hospital I walked the halls with my IV pole and did bending and stretching exercises in or beside my bed. Putting around in the garden always makes me instantly feel better and it's good exercise too.

After lying and hanging around for six months it was time for something more, so for the last few weeks I've been borrowing yoga and other gentle exercise DVD's from the library and trying to use them for half an hour every day. Exercise always makes me feel better!

checking out progress on the new ring road at the end of our street

4. Daily Devotions: It's good to know where our hope, strength, healing and comfort come from. So to keep my life in perspective and my focus on God, I need to spend time every day reading the Bible and praying. I find that when my life starts to run off track and when I lose perspective, then I need to do my reading and praying, or singing, or talking with friends who are strong spiritually, or attending or watching a church service.

5. Routine: After a while one day just ran into another and I lost my time orientation and also started feeling useless. Now I have things I do at approximately the same time every day (getting up, getting washed and dressed, meals and snacks, nap, preparing a smoothie and a salad, walking, exercise, reading, etc) and also things I do on specific days of the week (Sat. am -cook while listening to garden show, Sat. and Wed. - fill aquarium and water house plants, Sun. - attend or listen to church service, Thurs. - vacuum main floor, Fri. - vacuum basement, Sat.- sort papers for recycling). Nothing major, but something that helps determine what I do that day and reminds me which day it is. This is my "new normal"! For now, anyway.

6. Social Contacts: If you really want to punish me, then put me in total isolation. I need to have people contact for my well-being, so I try to visit in person or by phone every day.  It is wonderful and helpful to have a support system of friends, family, church community and neighbours!

7. Stay Connected with Outside World: I have found that when I became ill my world became smaller very quickly. Some days I didn't get out of the house or even out of bed at all. And so when I have the energy it helps to watch some news on TV, read bits of the paper, check the Internet, listen to news or talk shows on the radio, or even check Face Book. That way I have some interesting things to think about and some idea of what's going on "out there".

8. Count Your Blessings: Some days are discouraging. Sometimes I get into a negative rut. Then it helps me to count my blessings. That's what I do at night before I fall asleep - just lie there and think what I enjoyed about that day, and thank God specifically for each blessing.

Just trying to fit all these things into each day keeps me plenty busy.  Working on getting better is almost a full-time job!

"volunteer" flower growing from our compost - (squash?)